carol. if this were a piece of lyrical poetry, i'd call it "ode to carol"

last tuesday i went to dinner with my friend carol.

carol is wonderful for several reasons, mostly because she is just so caroly. for example, one time ryan was at trader joe's and he was about to drive away when he saw carol and she was pushing a cart. she sort of took a running start and then she jumped on the back of the cart and she rode it all the way across the street. and he came home and told me and i laughed really hard and said, 'oh! that's so carol! that's so carol!" and then i made a mental note to email her so we could go out to dinner IMMEDIATELY but i forgot and GUESS WHAT? carol emailed me the next day to ask if we could go out to dinner.

THAT, my friends, is CAROL.

so tuesday, we're having dinner at this little cafe that is one of the only two places to eat in the city i live in that is not a chain and i am saying to myself, "do not hoard the conversation, do not hoard the conversation, do not hoard the conversation." because my friend carol? she tends to listen and i me? i tend to talk. and even though i would appreciate the opportunity to practice listening, i just talk. and talk. and talk. all over carol.

i met carol at college. we were in an english class where i talked the whole time and everyone else (including the professor) listened. the professor, a man who i call by his first name, which is hart, who forever changed my life, thought that carol and i were an unlikely duo. and i was offended. but then i thought about it, and by thought about it, i probably mean talked for a really long time to someone who didn't even know who carol was, and i thought about how carol is such a good listener and not only that, she smiles really nicely while listening and laughs at all the right places, and suddenly, our friendship made sense.

this is what i thought about when i told carol (with much animation) all about my life and begged her to tell me the secrets to raising great kids (have i mentioned that carol is a mom to kids who are really cool?) and she thought for a minute and then said, "i think you're doing a great job."

to carol: had i picture of you, i'd stick it up here (you're probably grateful right now that i don't), but since i don't, this is my "yay carol!" post. thank you for dinner. thanks for wandering into a room of perfect strangers with guitars (and a flute!) with me and thanks for agreeing to do it again sometime. also? as i insisted you not get out of the car so i could tell you one more story and you politely stayed and listened? thank you for that also.

hernan is here and we are full of cheer!

went to the beach yesterday. oh. my. gosh. it was perfect. PERFECT. amazingly, beautiful, wonderful and perfect. i'm never leaving california. never. not even for a house with a barn and a greenhouse.

family

so i posted an engaged photo session that was really a family, and i'd thought i'd throw some family photos on here, a portfolio of sorts until i get the real thing going.

i met jenalyn when my parent's moved to where we are currently living when i was about seventeen and a half. if i hadn't been homeschooled and if the move was more than fifteen minutes away, this would have all been very devastating. jenalyn was in my early morning seminary class and, when we both weren't totally bleary eyed from lack of sleep, we'd chat.

and then we were young single people and we were getting together at the cheesecake factory to eat avocado egg rolls and talk about boys and school and future plans.

and now here we are, holding our babies against our hips, discussing things like exercise and breastfeeding, marital bliss and what we're making for dinner that night. and darren is a good dad. he's funny and kind and mellow--perfect for jenalyn and perfect for baby liam.

to liz something

i have a friend named liz. liz is like the energizer bunny. she has fifty times the energy of a normal person and she channels all of it into different projects at one time. it's impressive. like when she decided that she felt strongly about homeschooling? wow. it was all homeschooling all the time. or how about the importance of family? well, i think you all read her comments whenever i tapped that subject. she is passionate. she is wordy. she is liz. i just get exhausted thinking about putting that amount of effort into anything.

well, i've almost (almost!) gone all liz over this photography thing. so ryan comes home and i just start yammering away.

"see this? it's called blah blah blah. it occurs when blah blah blah. i think i should blah blah blah so i can blah blah blah. . ."

poor ryan. but you know what? he's gone all liz on mountain biking. he got a mountain bike and he started mountain biking early in the mornings and on saurdays and all of the sudden he's like, "see this? it's called blah blah blah. it occurs when blah blah blah. i think i should blah blah blah so i can blah blah blah. . ."

and now we're getting ready to go to mammoth for a week with all of ryan's family (read: 20 people in a 12 people condo) and ryan's all over the idea of mountain biking. so he gets online and he downloads the map and it's got all of these trails all over it and so he spends all of his time staring at these maps and planing which ones to take and blah blah blah and then, guess what?

he mails it to his dad, who has also suddenly gone all liz on mountain biking and his dad's so EXCITED! that he and ryan get together and start talking like, did you see that trail it's got blah blah blah. . .

so now ryan and his dad want to print the map out and frame it.

to which i reply, "you win. you have out-lizzed me."

congratulations you two.

one is silver

so after i aired my latest insecurities, hernan called me and was talking to me about photography. he said, "you have your own style and you're getting better at it."

i said, "i have no idea what you're talking about, but i like it."

may i just say thank you to all of the kind and sincere friends that are out there to offer me a kind word when i am feeling discouraged, even if i don't understand what you're saying?

thank you, i really mean it. it's nice to know a girl can get a little discouraged and have some kind support every once in awhile.

and the other's gold

last night i went out and had a real-deal girls night out. as embarassing as this is to admit, i think that was my first legitimate girls night out since ava was born. and, in a month that girl will be three years old. can you believe that?

it didn't happen on purpose, of course, but it happened. and this morning, i am a renewed woman.

so i sat around with my friend. she let me take pictures of her and then we talked about politics, god, michael jackson, race, photography, intelligence, passion, marriage, growing up. . .and we laughed and talked and laughed.

and ryan called and said, "don't worry about coming home in a hurry, take your time. i know you two like to talk."

i love my friend. i love her brain and i love her amazing good looks and i love her spirit. i also love the fact that last night i quoted her to herself.

and i love my husband. for too many reasons to list here, but mostly for all the same reasons that i love my friend.

it was a good night.