Tuesday, September 16, 2008

why i make such a great mother

So two days ago was Sunday, a day of church (hah! bet you thought i was going to say rest! well, there is no day of rest when you have children. and, if you're mormon, there's certainly no such thing as the sabbath being a "day of rest"). a week from last sunday, ryan and i attempted to shower and dress ourselves and our two young children and make it to our church meeting starting at 12:30. we almost did not make it. this is partly due to the fact that seth decided he was hungry just as we were putting him in his car seat. and then there was that moment when ava took her hand, dipped it in her cereal bowl, swished it around for good measure and then proceeded to wipe it dry on her hair. this was following the conversation ryan and i had about bathing children (silly me, i wanted to bathe them all).

"hey ry, will you put her in the bath?"

"why, is she dirty?"

"well, yeah. and she hasn't bathed since thursday morning."

"she doesn't smell bad to me."

"it's been three days since her last bath. she's dirty."

"i think we should only bathe our children if they smell."

yes, spoken like a true man. sadly, bath or no bath, the milk in the hair was done right before we left. ava's head dried to a nice crispy cowlick that was immovable. she also had just discovered a headband and refused to either leave it in or leave it at home. so on top of the cowlick made of milk, she also was sporting a very badly placed headband.

we made it, but by the time hour one was over, i was exhausted. and, since i'd just had a baby, i got to go home (lucky me). my mother had left her car keys with me when i promised that we'd drive my brothers home from church, so i told ryan i was leaving and taking the baby and drove home.

drove home to realize that the house key was on ryan's keychain and not my mother's. so i sat outside on the patio and nursed my baby. like i was some sort of placenta-burying woman or something. then ryan came home with my brothers and, "where's ava?" was asked by all.

it was asked because we'd left her at church. somehow, ryan thought that i was taking both kids home with me and i thought i was taking half of the kids home with me. we stink.

so ryan rushed back to the church building and i called and left messages with ava's teachers. lucky for ava, my dad was still at the church building and ava's teacher simply handed her over. ava thought she'd just been the lucky winner of some extra grandpa time. i am, meanwhile, feeling an awful amount of guilt and wondering just how much therapy i'm going to need to get over this.


redstarmama said...

I hate days like that. They just make you want to fling off your responsibilities, put your jammies on, burrow into your bed and cry. The only good thing about these days is that they end. And I think (and hope) they get fewer and farther between.

You are a great mom. You can't help it if everyone around you has agency!

Birgit said...

Yeah - days like this ...
Your text sounds like a normal day in a growing family. What Ryan said could have been Thomas´ words.
Keep cool, I promise: exaclty the same will never happen again. And - very important - it´s not your fault. Just forget these days.

Liz said...

I still like my parents and they left me in some podunk town in Illinois when we were on a road trip. After an all-points bulletin went out in Illinois and Missouri with their vehicle descriptions, they were finally tracked down by a fireman in Carthage. That was fun. :)

Amber Marie said...

oh Miriam! I think I have heard every single woman I know with multiple children tell a "i left the child" story. Maybe you should wait another month to go to church again :)

The whole bathing conversation is almost the exact conversation we have- except I agree with both Ryans! I just don't want someone to suddenly notice how bad my child smells before I do :)

Freckles said...

You make me laugh Miriam! How do any kids survive childhood, I mean really?! Our poor children. Haha

And you're right, Sunday is anything but a day of rest, in fact, it's my most stressful and busy day of the week, I don't enjoy Sunday's anymore!

Bug said...

Sounds like a mormon mom's Sunday to me. I know these kind of stories will happen to all of us, but it doesn't mean we go looking for them and then just accept them when they do. I'm so sorry. I would have been terrified and then emotional, but hey, when am I not when it comes to being a mom!

AnnieBJ said...

Oh the bathing! Before Emily came along I bathed Aidan EVERY night because that's what good mommies do, right? Rain or shine he got a bath. Now he's lucky to get more than just the requisite Saturday night bath.

And don't feel guilty about leaving Ava (easier said than done, I know). At least it was at church where someone would find her and get her to the right place and at least grandpa was there. You're right, she probably had a grand old time. She probably had no idea anything was wrong. That means you're off the hook in my book. :)

cara lou said...

Woohoo! I found your blog, too. :) Do I seem stalker-ish, now?

This post was hilarious. Sad that she was forgotten, but what better place to be left behind than the church building?

Mandy said...

I love how down to earth and realistic your blog is, you make motherhood seem doable and tangible...even on the hard days. Your "mice" are so cute, and I love reading the stories about them.

AND...I finally just saw the "blue man group" episodes on arrested development..HIlarious

Hernan said...

Likely it was at church... when I was 6 years old my mom (having 4 kids with her) forgot me in the middle of a store in downtown Buenos Aires City!!!!! She cried and then yied at me, the she huged me, then she cried again...

Krista said...

HA HA you had me laughing out loud at "I think we should only bathe our children when they stink." The wanna-be-super-mom side of me is appalled, whereas the regular Krista part of me is thinking, "AMEN!" That is a fabulous story, the whole thing. And yes Sunday will nevermore be a day of rest. Such is the fate of all Mormon mothers alike. (PS You might be amused to hear that while simultaneously nursing my baby and typing one-handed, I accidentally just typed "Moron" instead of "Mormon.")

Krista said...

Oh one more thing... do not feel guilty about leaving a child. My mom did it once and did not miss him for nearly an hour. Then when she called the pizza place (30 miles away), they informed her that she'd actually left two sons there.